Core Values and Why They Matter: Understanding What Truly Guides You

Written By Shaun Alladin

By Shaun Alladin, MA, LMHC
Orlando Therapist for ADHD, Multicultural, and LGBTQ+ Communities

In therapy, we often talk about goals. What you want to achieve, change, or move away from. But before you can work toward anything meaningful, there is a deeper foundation that deserves attention first.

Your core values.

Core values act as an internal compass. They influence your decisions, relationships, boundaries, and sense of identity. When you understand them, life tends to feel more aligned and intentional. When you feel disconnected from them, even choices that look good on paper can feel uncomfortable, heavy, or empty.

Whether you are navigating identity questions, cultural expectations, career decisions, or old emotional patterns, reconnecting with your core values can help you move forward with clarity instead of confusion.

Core values are the principles that reflect what genuinely matters to you. They are not what you were taught to care about and not what you think you should value. They are what feels meaningful at your core.

Examples of core values include:

  • Authenticity

  • Family

  • Stability

  • Creativity

  • Justice

  • Growth

  • Connection

  • Independence

  • Rest

  • Spirituality

  • Community

Values are not goals.
Values are directions.

They shape how you want to live your life, not just what you want to accomplish or check off a list.

Why Core Values Matter in Mental Health

1. Values create clarity when life feels overwhelming

When life feels chaotic or you feel stuck, your values provide grounding. They help you sort through outside pressures, expectations, and noise that may not actually belong to you.

For example, if you value rest and well-being but were raised in an environment that prioritizes constant productivity, understanding your values can help you choose care over burnout without guilt.

2. Values support aligned decision-making

Decisions that conflict with your values often feel wrong in your body, even if they look successful or impressive to others.

Setting boundaries, leaving a job, entering or ending a relationship, or prioritizing mental health becomes more manageable when those choices align with who you are and what you stand for.

3. Values support identity development, especially for multicultural and LGBTQ+ individuals

If you are bicultural, BIPOC, or part of the LGBTQ+ community, you may have internalized values that conflict with your lived experience or sense of self.

You might find that you value:

  • Chosen family over traditional family expectations

  • Self-expression over conformity

  • Authenticity over survival-based masking

  • Emotional openness over the pressure to always be strong

Exploring core values allows you to separate what truly belongs to you from what was inherited, imposed, or necessary for survival at an earlier stage of life.

4. Values reduce shame and increase self-compassion

When your actions align with your values, you tend to feel more grounded and steady. When they do not, shame can show up quickly.

Therapy helps you understand why misalignment happens and how to reconnect with what matters, rather than judging yourself for struggling.

5. Values guide healing and long-term change

Therapy is not only about reducing symptoms. It is about building a life that reflects who you are.

Core values give healing direction. They help ensure that growth is not just about coping better, but about living more fully and intentionally.

References

American Psychological Association. (2017). Ethical principles of psychologists and code of conduct. https://www.apa.org/ethics/code

Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2012). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

Rogers, C. R. (1961). On becoming a person: A therapist’s view of psychotherapy. Houghton Mifflin.

Schwartz, S. H. (2012). An overview of the Schwartz theory of basic values. Online Readings in Psychology and Culture, 2(1). https://doi.org/10.9707/2307-0919.1116

Sue, D. W., & Sue, D. (2016). Counseling the culturally diverse: Theory and practice (7th ed.). Wiley.

Shaun Alladin